It's November 2003, I'm living in a small 2 room basement apartment. It's always dark even on the most sunny days. It smells like stale cigarettes and alcohol. The rent is two hundred dollars a month and I am about to be evicted because I cannot pay it. I have just lost my second job in 2 months; I have no money, no smokes, no alcohol and no hope. I need help … I could walk to that smoke filled room and tell everyone how bad life is to me, and admit that I am powerless over alcohol. Than maybe I could borrow five bucks from someone and get a bottle … God what am I thinking? There is no help, everyone knows this is an incurable disease, at least that's what they keeping telling me. I stopped pacing and sat on a "chair" by the T.V. reached over and picked up a gun I had borrowed to go deer hunting with. One shot and my trouble would be over.
Easy enough, as I reached the table to pick up a bullet I saw a small piece of paper, something torn out of a newspaper, "Narconon Drug Rehab Center" Someone in my family most have left it … I think I called more for someone to talk to than anything but what I heard was unbelievable. He said there was a cure, that even I could be a positive part of society again … I put the gun down and started to listen and dug for a long cigarette butt out of the ash tray. I arrived at Narconon 5 days later. Thank God my parents never gave up on me. They had to pay my way and even drive me 14 hours to a small town called Three Rivers, in Canada. We arrived in the dark, I stayed, my parents and my 15-year-old son left. When I woke up the next morning I looked out the window of my room. I wonder where the gym is? The pool ? The hot tub? And when does the housekeeping lady come?
Well to my dismay we had none of these services. But what this place called Narconon had was worth far more than what we may (my parents) had paid for.
I have been sober for 7 months now, no drugs, and no alcohol. I have graduated from Narconon and have left Canada. I will never forget the staff there. Without their commitment to the program, with their willingness to work 12-15 hour days and without their willingness to handle 60 students during night and day. I would not be here today. The staff and the Narconon program taught me that I can be a positive part of society and that I can make a difference in other people's lives.
I am now part of the program that saved my life. I am back in Michigan working on staff at Narconon Stone Hawk. I am rebuilding my life and my relationship with my son and parents, and helping other people realize we are not powerless over our addictions. We can overcome them and be a valuable positive part of society. I thank God I picked up that piece of paper and not a bullet that night. I thank Narconon for teaching me I never have to take that chance again.
How's life in the great white north? Things are going pretty good down here, the weather sucks but that's what you get for living in Michigan. As you know I am still at Narconon Stone Hawk. I am an Intake Counselor here and I love my job. Sometimes I wish I were more involved with the students as they go through the program, just because working here (at the help line offfice) I can lose track of why I stayed in the first place. I need to see and hear more about the wins the students are having as they mature in the program. When I arrived here after graduation I arrived with a small suit-case and a 1983 Ford car. I had lost everything long before I went to Canada. I knew Narconon had taught me that I could be a successful part of society again but I was still pretty scared, all I knew was failure was not an option. Failure will never be an option. A few days ago I was sitting on my porch, at my house, overlooking the lake in front of the house, with my truck sitting in the driveway. The sun was setting across the lake and all was well in my world. As I sat there I thought of where I was less then two years ago, a drunk nearly homeless person with no job and no will to live. The Narconon program is saving lives all over the world and I am proud to be a part of that, but Narconon will forever be the place that saved my life.
Thank You All.